Because Hollywood Is Still Out Of Fresh Ideas…..
Keanu Reeves is the type of actor you pay to see perform ONLY because you need impressions of him that you can use to masturbate with later. You know the bitch can’t act but he’s sexier than a case of dick~on~the~go.
Dick~on~the~go comes in a can and its that quickie you need without the drama that usually accompanies it. Its better than a dildo because its the real thing but better than the real thing because it won’t talk and guarantees you’ll be satisfied 100% of the time. You control its every move and the best part about it is, it allows you to GO GREEN because you can toss it in the recycling bin when you’re done. Hey, one slut’s trash is another slut’s treasure.
AnyHardDickWillDo,
Universal is developing a modern retelling of the classic novella “The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde,” with Keanu Reeves attached to star. Plot details for this “Jekyll” are being kept on lock down.
