Biel’s Body Better Covered
Damn, Justin Timberpussy’s piece looked smokin’ HAWT at the Valentine’s Day premiere in LA last night.
She was on Leno last week looking painfully thin, so thin that she made my dick hurt, ya’ll know I don’t have a dick. But I like to pretend that I do, sometimes, and while my fake dick and I were robbing ho’s of their dignity last week, Jessica Biel entered through the back door, (not sure who let this skinny bitch in), and made me grab, tuck and run.
I’m going to assume that Justin’s voice is bigger than his manhood because I think men who are workin’ with that monsta prefer women with parts that they can grab on to and hold while he’s beatin’ them walls down. I think if you spit on one of Biel’s walls this fragile bitch will melt. But hell, she’s werkin’ that dress!!! That’s not a typo, I mean to say WERKIN’!!!
BTW: you see the signage in the background that says Hollywoodland Experience, I pass by it everyday on my way to and from work, so if you’re hoping that the Hollywoodland Experience involves drugs, Ambien Sex and a photo op of you pissing on a Kardashian, you’ll be disappointed. I was.
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